Nothing But God

It hit me a couple days ago that this time last year our lives were so broken. Chad and I were separated and awaiting our divorce to be finalized after affairs and betrayal had destroyed our lives together.  I was living in a small townhouse with my 5 children ages 1 to 9. Chad was living in a shady hotel.

Life. Was. Awful.

It was hard! I was so depressed and my doctor put me on so many different kinds of medication trying to help but they only made things worse. I look back now and I don’t even remember much.  It was all a horrible blur.

Everything around me was shattered. It was like standing in a war-torn town full of rubble. I couldn’t see a way out and I had no strength to try. It left me with nothing.

Nothing but God.

What a scary yet amazing place to be! The only hope that I was going to find would be in Christ. I had nothing left to look to.  Family and friends were doing all they could to help, but they couldn’t give me what I needed. They couldn’t give me peace.

Even then I was stubborn.  Ask Chad or my mother and they will attest to my stubborn streak.  Not stubborn in a hateful way but stubborn all the same. And now I can see that I was stubborn with God. I wanted things my way. I wanted things to change like yesterday. It was my way or the highway in my mind. And well, the highway was where I ended up. A long stretch of road that looked like it lead to no where good. That’s the road that God placed me on.

Why would God do that you might say? I will tell you that it went against everything I believed. I believed that only good things came from God and that He would never place me on a difficult path. If I found myself on a road of trouble then it was my fault or someone had it in for me, but not God. I don’t feel that way now. Reading stories in the Bible about Moses, Joseph, Paul and others and examining the lives of saints before me like Brother Lawrence and Madame Guyon makes it obvious to me that God placed them in difficult, sometimes even terrible, circumstances. Why?

So they would have nothing left but Him.

 

Now, I look back at that horrible time and see it as an act of love from my Father.  He didn’t allow me to continue on the broad path that leads to destruction. He put me in a place to wake me up and get my attention. It’s a shame that it would take such tragedy to catch my attention but that’s how most of us are. How many are desperate for God when life is great and everything is going our way? Not many, if any of us. It just goes against our nature.

So here’s my encouragement to you today. If you find yourself in a place that horrifies you..praise God! If you look around and can see no way out..praise God! If everything around you is crumbling..praise God! You have nothing! Nothing but God!  God  sees you and loves you so much that he is willing to do anything to win you, even take everything away.

You are loved! You are blessed, and you are on your way to an experience with God that many will never know if you will only yield to Him and let Him work in your heart. Don’t let your life be a sad story. Let God make it a story of victory through hardship and peace in the midst of pain.

Those are God’s stories.

Today my life is not full of rubble and destruction. Chad and I are in love and my children are doing amazing.  Now, when we face trials as a couple or a family I do not fear, but remember that those hardships are there for a reason…..So I will remember I have nothing but God.

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.  And let  steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing”  (James 1:2-4)

 

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